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2017, Exit Stage Left

2017, Exit Stage Left

The first time I felt wholly remarkable was the day I gave birth to Scarlett. 2017 has been a year of growth, development, tenacity and flat-out grinding.

2017 was remarkable and I challenge you to sit with the question, “when is the last time I felt remarkable”?

Have you wondered why it is that you just can’t seem to figure it out? Perhaps you don’t know what to do, or where to start with any of it. It feels like your goals are out of reach, the job you desire is out of the question, the partner you want unobtainable. Why?

Changing my body has been incredible.

Changing my career path? Note-worthy.

However, nothing has been more impactful to my entire life than changing my head.

I realized the importance of loving my entire self instead of waiting for the end goal. I found out that what I think is just as important as what I say and I made gratitude a priority.

If you’re anything like me you might be rolling your eyes, or better, closing out of this.

Hear me out.

Yes that’s right, gratitude more than anything has changed my life.

This year was SO GOOD, and it was also SO CHALLENGING.

I navigated my way to making the gym a priority in my schedule, that right there can be enough to make people shut down.

I navigated falling madly in love with motherhood.

I navigated tracking macros, being really honest and vulnerable to my nutrition coach, being a brand new business owner, having no clue what the fuck I was doing, being broke as a joke, quitting my comfortable job, and doing my (sometimes) best at nurturing my marriage.

Phew.

At first, I didn’t realize I was actually practicing the art of gratitude. I remember being at the gym early this year, feeling defeated before I even began and thinking, “ugh, it’s okay. Thank God I’m here.”

Sometimes it was a subtle mom-moment check. Scarlett would be frustrated from being in the car during deliveries and start to cry. I couldn’t reach her to help her, so I began feeling frustrated and I would think, “but I’m here. I’m really here, doing this, with her. I’m so lucky.” Other times it was actual celebration. I had a successful week financially, I managed to not fuck up an order, I managed to shower more than 3 times a week, and I would just say thank you. As I began reading more about mindset and gratitude, things began to click. All those things I assumed were small comments here and there were actually making a huge difference in my life. I started saying thank you whilst eating the shit sandwich of the day, when we got sick as a reminder to slow down, when I wanted to strangle my husband, a reminder that we needed to go on a date. While I could write pages about gratitude and I imagine someday I will, I will spare you today and leave it at that. But seriously, say thank you as often as you can. While you’re at it, raise your children to say thank you too.

Back to being remarkable.

As the year closes out and a new year begins, I really urge you to get inspired by what it is you want to knock out of the park in 2018.

Maybe it’s one of the big-ticket items aforementioned. Maybe it’s something simpler like reading 1 book a month, getting some sun on your face 10 minutes a day or flossing. No matter how big or small the changes you want to make seem the bottom line is you have to take personal responsibility.

While I intend on getting more in-depth on the “how” at some point, here are some points I stress that anyone can implement right this second to becoming the you, you’d like to be.

1. Time management is CRITICAL. I cannot stress this enough. For the moms, the business owners, the non-business owners, the stay at home moms, the human beings… Whether you’re the mom that is constantly dubbed the hot-mess, the person that swears there isn’t enough time in the day, the habitual late guy, etc. it is time you take personal responsibility of YOUR TIME and create that shit.

2. Love yourself right now. I really started preaching this early this summer after buying and wearing my first pair of shorts. SHORTS of all things, not even jean shorts, were the catalyst to my self-kindness. I started speaking and thinking niceties to myself. I let go of the nagging bitch in my head when I made a mistake and I took pride in my ever-changing body. It’s simple, y’all. It can also be challenging, hokey to some and feel funny at first but it’s so necessary.

3. Say thank you, all the time, to everyone.

Do something you’ve always wanted to, do something creative, take the trip, repair relationships, get a dog, whatever sets you on fire.

I hope you lean in hard and make your 2018 remarkable.

Slow Your Holiday Roll

Slow Your Holiday Roll

Oh, the American Christmas.

The gift cards, the stress, the 987 presents for kids, the screaming over the last Hatchimals (but seriously, I know they’re so last year, but what are they?!), the over-spending of money, under-spending of quality time, and then it’s over.

Not this year, my friends. Not for me and mine. Here’s a list of things that makes the holiday season, your life even, a bit more bearable.

Scarlett is just over a year, so it’s even easier for us to get this down. As a semi-minimalist, I already don’t enjoy STUFFING. Scarlett, and most children in my opinion, don’t need 987 toys. We’re experienced-base, trip-oriented and live accordingly. We do:

1. Something you want

2. Something you need

3. Something you can read

To me, birthdays are for doing slight extra. Scarlett, it’s Jesus’ birthday, so sit down.

 

We do it this way so that she grows up expecting less and experiencing more. It’s more important for me that we are well traveled rather than well stocked.

To each their own.

If it’s too much, just stop. Your aunt’s-cousin-sister-mother-friend-babysitter? Give it a rest, already. What I will say, is that if you are truly THAT LIT UP about giving every single person you’ve ever came in contact a gift, fine. However, don’t expect the same in return for people like me are not about the Extra Stressed Life, and I show my love and gratitude in other ways. #SucksToSuck

Stop over committing.

Just this year I really started to implement this more in my life and let me tell you, it’s a game changer. This goes for the holidays and more importantly, your entire life. If you are going to end up spending more time rearranging your schedule just to fit it in than the actual event itself, just no. I’ve been in a season of big-time growth this year. I’ve kept my head down, turned down social events, happy-hours etc to get to where I’m at. That doesn’t mean that I don’t love my friends, that’s just where I’m at and that’s okay in my book. I’m in no way saying that you should swear off any hopes of a social life or dates with your spouse in order to be successful. Actually, I mean the opposite. Do what you can, know that seasons (especially the holiday kind) are not life times and if you can’t fit it don’t force it. If you don’t want to make two thousand cookies for another bake sale because you want to stay in your jammies with your family, you can and you should.

Be authentic and honest with yourself. Make an effort when you feel called, not when you feel obligated. If you don’t like your family, make one. Surround yourself with people you do want to be around and that is your family. If your past holidays have done you dirty, start new traditions in order to create new memories like I have.

Adopt a family or donate your time to a cause you are passionate about.

Say no when you need to.

Eat Chinese food on Christmas Eve.

Spike your hot chocolate before you go look at Christmas lights.

Drink in the moment your kid get hits by the holiday spirit and lights up brighter than your Christmas tree.

Fall in love with the look on their face.

Sing Christmas carols in your underwear/diapers, using a dinosaur as a microphone.

And for fuck sake, pull out the strand of icicle lights from your ass and remember that magic exists, if you let it.